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Old 02-23-2014, 09:16 AM   #1
velvetglove

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Default Hokum Magazine 2014

Hokum Magazine 2014.

So why has 2014 been a complete wash out?

When I was young or so much younger than today (Nice lyrics) I worked at a research establishment at Weybridge, Surrey, England. Next door to the animal research centre for Foot and Mouth. We had a canteen on site and always wondered where the food came from!
Staines was very close, who wants to live in a place called Staines? Not me. So the occupants seem to have changed the name to Staines upon Thames. Since the floods of 2014 I believe theyíre about to change the name once more to Thames upon Staines.
OK so Staines isnít the most spectacular place to live in the UK, there are far more exotic addresses you may wish to consider:-

Bell End, Worcestershire, England. I told you so.

Twatt, Shetland (note, there is another Twatt in Orkney) But no one is prepared to give his name!!

Sandy Balls, a long-established holiday centre in New Forest, Hampshire, England with a name dating back to Henry VIII. We also had a comedian in the UK named Dick Emery (bit of a rough hand full)

Cumming Court, Pitville, Gloucestershire, England. Say that again!

Fanny Avenue, Derbyshire, England. No comment.

Shitterton, Dorset, England, yet to find a cure for constipation.

Titty Ho Northampton. Somewhere the BBC never film.

Happy Bottom, Dorset. Perhaps the guys from Shitterton should move there.

Personally I used to live quite close to a cul-de-sac named Fennis close, Itís amazing what a drop of black paint can do!

And my son lives in a property just off Shaggs Lane Lyndhurst, New Forest He has 4 children!!!

Iím wondering are local councils missing a trick here. Maybe if they named a road so badly it would make the Rude Name list and get hits from all over the World.

Oh and by the way there is a spot in Austria called F*****G. You are now leaving! OK so the second word is OFF.
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Old 02-23-2014, 07:31 PM   #2
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Hilarious! We have some towns like that in the US. There is a region in Pennsylania about an hour from where I grew up with a series of towns: Blue Ball, Intercourse and Paradise. At least theree's a happy ending!
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Old 02-23-2014, 07:32 PM   #3
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BTW, has the flooding affected you? Has being an engineer helped any?
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Old 02-23-2014, 09:00 PM   #4
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Cool we weren't flooded but on New Years Eve the wind was so strong it forced water into the brickwork and the water penetrated the oak floor we had laid 2013. £2500-00 of damage! The work has been done, the insurance coughed up and all is in order now. The house is up for sale if you're thinking of moving to the UK?
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Old 02-23-2014, 10:39 PM   #5
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such interesting place names.
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Old 02-24-2014, 10:16 AM   #6
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Lol I saw Staines had added 'on Thames'. Staines was always a dump. Maybe it's gone so up market it needed to change. Or if it has 'on Thames' it gets help from the govenrment when it floods unlike poor old Somerset
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Old 02-24-2014, 04:44 PM   #7
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There is a town in Idaho by the name of Athol/
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Old 02-25-2014, 02:05 AM   #8
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Athol. I am SO glad I don't live there. Cab you imagine what their sports rivals call them?

No, thank you, Paul, but I am sorry about the floor. Not only does water ruin the floor, it gives a house mold. (You call it damp?) I know your region got flooded, Merrick, but is your home still OK?

Maybe the town is the stains upon the Thames?
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Old 02-25-2014, 07:12 PM   #9
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Our local coast was hit badly in December last year, Cool, some people lost their homes to the sea.....literally over the cliff into the sea We have had a lot of rain and wind since then but we are not close enough, or on low land, to flood. We have been the lucky ones.
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Old 02-26-2014, 02:52 AM   #10
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People are losing houses here, too. Not over cliffs, mind: we haven't any. They showed our riverbanks on the CBS Evening News tonight. The ice broke up and then refroze as a nasty, dangerous, floating mess and they're worried about the ice pressure shoving the lighter weight bridges off their moorings. I'm so glad I live on a hill.
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Old 11-27-2015, 08:04 PM   #11
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I've just remembered something. There's a lot of written work here, some creative, some downright crazy and Harry Potter.
It's been a very long time since I've even considered the Highlander Fandom. But still everything Mr Paul, up until the Drake thing, is stored in the new loft. All under plastic wrap for the next generation to find. No I'm not going anywhere, Well not for a while. It's just who the hell do you leave it too?

I could offer it for sale I suppose but then it would be a shame to deprive my kids and their kids of what we were into for a while. So there it stays.
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Old 11-28-2015, 05:04 AM   #12
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And when you are gone & your kids are going through that stuff, their heads will shake in baffled bewilderment and the final validation that their parents really WERE weird. But it's all good
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Old 11-29-2015, 07:24 PM   #13
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Sadly mine is all packed in a cupboard Who would buy it if you put it for sale anyway?
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Old 11-30-2015, 05:11 AM   #14
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Good question. Though I have heard of a handful of those still so Highlander crazy, you might get a few things sold.
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Old 11-30-2015, 09:32 AM   #15
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I have a lot of AP stuff which probably wouldn't sell now either. For what it's worth it wouldn't be worth the time and effort to sell sadly.

I expect when the family clear though my stuff it will all end up in a skip or on a bonfire
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